Saturday, August 7, 2021

Stages of Retirement Planning for Artists

 YOUNG GRASSHOPPER: omg, slow your AARP roll. LOL! Retiring what, this keg stand?

OPTIMISTIC DELUSIONS: im just trying to work, man. Once my art drops, I'm gonna be filthy.

SLOW DRIP: I think I bought an eagle bond or an eagle coin or something with an eagle on it. That'll go up in value, right?

RECORD SCRATCH REALIZATION: Social Security only pays HOW MUCH?!? Ok...breathe...breathe...

OCEAN'S 11: I've been watching a few bank heists movies and anything is possible. This could be a cool Robin Hood project, we can get the old pilates-improv class together, do some trust building exercises. Circle, Mirror, Transformation. I can definitely drive the getaway car b/c Super Mario Kart is my jam.

APOCALYPSE SOON?: oceans gonna swallow all of this up anyway. We won't be here. Lakes will be on fire, fish will be dead. What am I gonna do in a retirement condo with zombies once this next plague hits? I'll feel stupid saving all that money for zombies to bite me! 

WELCOME BACK, KOTTER: artists don't retire. Retirement is failure. Imma ball 'till I fall. Teach till the Reaper Reach. That's always been my motto. Plus next generation will keep me young. 

CHECKING ON FAMILY: I should go see my uncle. He has a house or a farm or a yurt somewhere. Let me send him a Christmas card.

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Thank you, Morgan Jenness. Rest in Peace.

 "You need to meet Morgan!" At different times throughout my early NYC yrs ppl would say that to me: meet Morgan Jenness. She was ...