Monday, December 26, 2016

Kwanzaa UMOJA: Door in the Face vs. Foot in the Door

From relearning "Bargaining and Negotiations" class...

Foot-in-the-door vs. Door-in-the-face. Foot-in-the-door is the small ask that eventually leads to the 'real ask.' A door-to-door salesman asks for a glass of water to get in the door to ask for five minutes, and then a series of small asks leads to selling something. A guy asks if he can carry a girl's books to her locker, to establish a habit of caring for the girl, in order to ask her out on a date. FITD depends upon the listener feeling helpful or valuable.

Door-in-the-face is the big ask that will be rejected by the listener so that the real ask seems more reasonable. DITF depends upon the listener saying 'no' to an ask and then feeling guilty about it, so that the real ask seems reasonable.

My first job in high school was at a local newspaper. I used foot-in-the-door: just let me write an article. One, that's all I ask. I wrote the article, the response was very positive, so I asked to write another article. After a few articles I switched to door-in-the-face and walked into the publisher's office and asked to be a newspaper staff writer. The publisher laughed. I was in high school and had no experience. But I listed my articles' positive response and work ethic, he felt a bit guilty, then he 'offered' the freelance writer position that was well-paying. He never would have given me that job if I would have asked for it upfront. He ended up giving me what I wanted b/c I over-asked and negotiated to a reasonable medium.

On the first day of Kwanzaa I am remembering that persuasion techniques -FITD and DITF- can be used to get people to reach common ground, work together, achieve our goals, and create community. UMOJA.

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