Sunday, July 15, 2012

A dressing room orgy. GUEST BLOG.

I've always wanted to tell this story because it's one of the most inhumane things I have ever observed. And it really reminded me how inhumane we treat each other on a daily basis without acknowledgement. About four years ago I was a disgruntled employee of Urban Outfitters and I had to wear things like this:




  • Tripp NYC Zebra Print Jean 
     
    to work! Attractive, I know. But besides wearing hipster clothing I was asked to do highly important tasks. I mean life changing chores such as standing at the front door for hours, saying "Welcome to Urban Outfitters" and folding those coveted pair of jeggings with a fake smile on my face. Sometimes I was sent to "man" the dressing rooms where I would hand out keys and tell people those skinny jeans looked really good on them (even if they didn't). 

    One day a homeless man came into the dressing room with a stack of pants and T-shirts. He might have not been homeless but he seemed like he had been through a rough time (dirty/tattered clothing, alcohol breath, and smelling like he hadn't showered in a while). It was a busy night so I quickly opened a room for him and rushed to the next customer. The man thanked me and I saw that he was missing some teeth, but I still didn't deny him service. I mean people without teeth still need clothes too, right?

    Well a couple of minutes later I hear groaning and moaning from the man's dressing room. I kept folding and tried to ignore it, I mean maybe he was having trouble putting on a shirt? Maybe he noticed the price tag and was groaning with disbelief at the how over priced most of the clothing in that store is.

    A few minutes later I heard more intense groaning, but this time I realize that these are sounds of pleasure. Another customer asks me what is going on, so I walk over to the man's dressing room and see the clothing he was wearing is in a ball on the floor. This man is completely naked and he is masterbating in front of a full length mirror in the comforts of his locked dressing room.
     
    I panic as the man really gets down and dirty with himself. 

    I page my manager that there is an emergency situation that I can't explain over the walkie talkie. Meanwhile, customers clear out of the dressing room. Between this man's smell and the animal like sounds he's making, I'm surprised I stayed in there. 

    But then, just at that moment, this homeless man reaches an astonishing climax like a nimble gymnast's dismount, the man screams mercy and jumps landing ass first in the stall. That's right. His hairy and unwashed butt landed in plain view and the man began snoring. He was spent.


    My manager comes in and asks what all the fuss is about and all I have to do it point at the man's ass sticking out of the stall. My manager looks at me like this is a first and I ask what the hell we are supposed to do. He calls the security dude and they pound on the door until the man wakes up. He gets dressed in his own clothes and is escorted out of the store and asked never to return. 

    After the homeless man is gone my manager comes back down to the dressing room and gives me a pair of gloves and a plastic trash bag. You can see where this is headed. My manager asks me to put any clothes found in the homeless man's dressing room in the bag and throw it away immediately. 

    If you've ever worked in retail you know that most stores NEVER THROW ANY ARTICLE OF CLOTHING AWAY, NEVER. Damaged, previously worn, and unrepairable clothing is never discarded. Its always put back on the shelf as is and sold to another person who doesn't notice that the item is damaged and then when they try to return it they keep the money and give them store credit. Fucking retail industry!

    Despite the fact that this man committed a lewd act in public, he was still a human being. He obviously didn't have another place to go and obviously needed some help and obviously had a mental problem or two. Yet, he was was treated like a criminal and everything he touched in the store was thrown away, as if the store needed cleansing from reality. A clothing store turned away a man who was in need of clothing which seems unethical to me. And then they trashed any clothing he might have used because his poverty stricken fingers touched them.

    This homeless man stuck with me. And as I threw the clothing away, I reflected on the fact that I too am guilty of treating people in an inhumane fashion. One prime example is on the subway. Everyday I see homeless men and women sometimes giving them some change but most of the time turning the other cheek because I am tired or because they are annoying me on my commute. But my dressing room fiasco made me realize that all people deserve respect or at the very least acknowledgement that they are in fact human beings. This might seem like common sense but you would be surprised how often we forget this fact.

    --Fernanda, guest blogging for Aurin while he is away.

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