I've been thinking about this special a lot. Chappelle's "Sticks and Stones" has gotten 99% love from fans and widespread hatred by critics. I watched Dave Chappelle's special on Netflix and went to Hannah Gadsby's live show "Douglas" that evening. And I hate to admit it but...I laughed a lot at both Chappelle and Gadsby.
I grew up going to mostly-white rich schools. I was made extremely uncomfortable b/c of my race, class and sexuality. Yes, I was called the 'n word' and the 'f word' a lot. My parents' advice? 'Toughen the fuck up and don't come crying to us.' Yeah, perhaps they were not the best words of encouragement, but it was the 80s and they were mildly homophobic and fearful of raising a gay black son who didn't have a toolkit to defend themselves in this cruel world. So I couldn't go to my parents, I couldn't go to the teachers...so I just had to find a way to get through the day. It was wildly uncomfortable some times. I read a lot of self-help books and histories on military strategy. I went through Machiavelli's "The Prince" several times and "Art of War." I learned when to fight back physically, when to use wit, how to employ self-deprecating clowning, and when to just cut bait and run for my life. Some times I would use a pre-emptive punch or shove to thwart a potential bully. Mostly though, my words got me out of a lot of confrontations...some times the bullies would even become my friends because I had so thoroughly mind-fucked them without ever having to lift a finger.
I was extremely uncomfortable...and then I was extremely grateful as an adult for the toolkit produced by that discomfort. During that time was the rise of gangsta rap music and Def Comedy Jam. At first, I didn't get it. I was really horrified at the perceived cruelty comedians and rappers would use on stage. And the crowds would go wild! I really REALLY didn't get Def Comedy Jam. The rawer and more punishing the comedian, the more audiences roared with laughter. The comedians didn't wait for hecklers...they heckled the audience with savagery. And the audience loved it. At a certain point, I realized...this was the black experience. Comedians, clowns, jesters took that pain and made you laugh. I realized I could dismiss the crowd and comedians. Some of the jokes were racist, homophobic, many were about being so fucking angry about being poor and black (the crowd loved those). They related to the anger at the world and laughed with their wolf teeth. While I still didn't like it, I learned that this was their own self-defensive mechanism.
And now the Chappelle special reaction: about half of my friends (POC and queer) love it. Rave about how this is important and vital to have something that makes them laugh, think, and squirm with discomfort...and the other half of my friends HATE it...hate it, like you're hurting them by watching it. Hate it like they're brutalized by the comedy. And these are smart ppl...on both sides. They present their arguments with logic and passion, and I feel like I understand both sides.
I grew up going to mostly-white rich schools. I was made extremely uncomfortable b/c of my race, class and sexuality. Yes, I was called the 'n word' and the 'f word' a lot. My parents' advice? 'Toughen the fuck up and don't come crying to us.' Yeah, perhaps they were not the best words of encouragement, but it was the 80s and they were mildly homophobic and fearful of raising a gay black son who didn't have a toolkit to defend themselves in this cruel world. So I couldn't go to my parents, I couldn't go to the teachers...so I just had to find a way to get through the day. It was wildly uncomfortable some times. I read a lot of self-help books and histories on military strategy. I went through Machiavelli's "The Prince" several times and "Art of War." I learned when to fight back physically, when to use wit, how to employ self-deprecating clowning, and when to just cut bait and run for my life. Some times I would use a pre-emptive punch or shove to thwart a potential bully. Mostly though, my words got me out of a lot of confrontations...some times the bullies would even become my friends because I had so thoroughly mind-fucked them without ever having to lift a finger.
I was extremely uncomfortable...and then I was extremely grateful as an adult for the toolkit produced by that discomfort. During that time was the rise of gangsta rap music and Def Comedy Jam. At first, I didn't get it. I was really horrified at the perceived cruelty comedians and rappers would use on stage. And the crowds would go wild! I really REALLY didn't get Def Comedy Jam. The rawer and more punishing the comedian, the more audiences roared with laughter. The comedians didn't wait for hecklers...they heckled the audience with savagery. And the audience loved it. At a certain point, I realized...this was the black experience. Comedians, clowns, jesters took that pain and made you laugh. I realized I could dismiss the crowd and comedians. Some of the jokes were racist, homophobic, many were about being so fucking angry about being poor and black (the crowd loved those). They related to the anger at the world and laughed with their wolf teeth. While I still didn't like it, I learned that this was their own self-defensive mechanism.
And now the Chappelle special reaction: about half of my friends (POC and queer) love it. Rave about how this is important and vital to have something that makes them laugh, think, and squirm with discomfort...and the other half of my friends HATE it...hate it, like you're hurting them by watching it. Hate it like they're brutalized by the comedy. And these are smart ppl...on both sides. They present their arguments with logic and passion, and I feel like I understand both sides.
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